The Nuking of Duke Nukem 325
Rick Bentley writes with more on the story behind the meltdown of Duke Nukem Forever, the game that will now live on only as a cautionary tale: "Although the shutdown was previously reported on Slashdot, this new Wired article goes in-depth behind the scenes to paint a picture of a mushroom cloud-sized implosion. Developers spending a decade in a career holding pattern for below market salary with 'profit sharing' incentives, no real project deadlines, a motion capture room apparently used to capture the motion of strippers (the new game was to take place in a strip club, owned by Duke, that gets attacked by aliens), and countless crestfallen fans. *Sniff*, I would have played that game."
as a kid (Score:5, Funny)
School day became to end and I tried to consider my options, but there were none. I had to go help my papa make pizza. Frustraded, almost crying, I walked the streets of Naples back home. Every now and then I watched inside a window on the street and noticed someone playing on computer. I was thinking if that could be it, but I'd never know.
I decided to think for a moment. Like a good oven takes its time and peace to bake and finish a delicious pizza, my padre would wait for me. It was time to go see what the game was about.
And I was amazed. Great looking graphics, funny sounding man that I did not understand and girls with something on their chest that looked like doughnuts with a salami on top of it. It was truly marvelous.
While later serving customers at my fathers pizza place, I couldn't but think that I have to get a computer and this Duke Nukem 3D game. I mean, I loved baking pizza. But there is a time when a boy must choose between leisure and girls. But my father never got me a computer.
Like an overbaked pizza, my dreams were crushed when Duke Nukem Forever never came.
And now for something completely obvious (Score:5, Funny)
Developers spending a decade in a career holding pattern for below market salary with 'profit sharing' incentives, no real project deadlines, a motion capture room apparently used to capture the motion of strippers
Really, that's just too easy. Can't you at least make it a challenge to get +5 Funny???
Oh well, here goes... Sounds like my job, but without the strippers.
Damn! (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Never mind the sourcecode (Score:3, Funny)
Yeah. I'd like a copy of the assets of those assets.
Re:Damn! (Score:5, Funny)
so you are this guy [yfrog.com]?
I'm here to kick ass and pay salaries (Score:5, Funny)
And I'm all out of money.
It's time to (Score:4, Funny)
Duke Nukem isn't dead... (Score:5, Funny)
... I saw him yesterday in Avatar.
Had To Laugh (Score:5, Funny)
I don't need this Game (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Where is the funny? (Score:5, Funny)
Just because something is pretty doesn't mean to say that it is good.
+1 Avatar reference
Re:Developers with style (Score:3, Funny)
A project where they are motion capturing strippers, no wonder the project has got nowhere! Probably the most uncovered women these 'nerds' have seen in their life. Why would they want to stop that?!
Re:as a kid (Score:2, Funny)
like a blood soaked tampon left in for too long, DNF died of toxic shock syndrome?
Re:Vaporware Free software projects (Score:5, Funny)
The project was put on hold in 2008 while I got out of the Slashdot-posting basement and looked for a girlfriend. I finally got one around the end of 2008,
Wow... phrased like that, getting a girlfriend is like a side quest in the RPG of your life.
Re:Developers with style (Score:5, Funny)
Well, You know what they say. It's better to have motion captured strippers and lost, than to have never motion captured strippers at all...
Re:as a kid (Score:5, Funny)
Re:*nah* *nah* *nah* (Score:5, Funny)
I refuse to believe that they've cancled this... *nah* *nah* *nah* I can't hear you.. AC - patiently holding my breath since 1997
It's ok.. I heard a rumour that it is going to come pre installed on the Apple tablet.
Re:Vaporware Free software projects (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Good riddance (Score:3, Funny)
Well, considering the time it took, the kids that played DN are now old enough to buy Mature rated games, so...
Re:Never mind the sourcecode (Score:5, Funny)
Ah yes, slashdot, the only place I know of where a discussion about video games will devolve into a debate about who knows more about watching naked women dance on a pole.
Re:Vaporware Free software projects (Score:3, Funny)
If only the real-life girlfriend quest was as easy as finding a girl with a giant exclamation point over her head.
It can be... But then it's a real pain in the ass 'cause she starts talking and you've got to keep pressing the A button to skip over it.
Re:Never mind the sourcecode (Score:5, Funny)
and the comments are strangely not off topic...
One would expect that given the social life of the average slashdotter, all stripper-related comments would be +5 Informative.
Re:Developers with style (Score:3, Funny)
Pretty sure that's illegal in most states...
No, no, that's *capturing* strippers. Motion capturing them is quite legal. You just have to ask really nicely before you try to stick the little green dots on them. Or so I hear. I've never even touched... er, met... umm, I mean *seen* a stripper. And I've never been within fifty yards of an elementary school in the... Hey, is that Ubuntu? You should show me how that works and stop reading this post before my parole off... mom gets here.
Aww, dammit.
Re:Developers with style (Score:3, Funny)