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Portables (Games) Operating Systems BSD Entertainment Games

OpenBSD Ported to Gameboy 136

RevDobbs noted that a new site dedicated to OpenBSD on the Game Boy Advanced SP platform. Since the 4 Player Link Cable is supported, no doubt a variety of networking applications will soon follow.
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OpenBSD Ported to Gameboy

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  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:20PM (#8740533)


    Kim Yee: Thanks for giving us this interview, Mr. de Raadt.

    Theo de Raadt: Just "Theo" is fine.

    Yee: OK, Theo, thank you. Why did you decide to port to the Gameboy Advanced SP?

    de Raadt: What? Are you a retard? The standard Gameboy Advanced OS has no security whatsoever. A child could hack it.

    Yee: Umm.. Will it be able to play the standard GBA games as well as run OpenBSD or will it be a one way street?

    de Raadt: [sighs] You're fucking stupid. Once you install OpenBSD on it, it will be the most secure gaming platform in the world. The standard GBA games suck shit, they have no security. A mere moron, such as yourself, could exploit them.

    Yee: So... no?

    de Raadt: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I JUST SAID?! You're more stupid than you look! Go! Go now and get your hair cut into a mullet! Go!

    Yee: How many packets-per-second can it run through PF?

    de Raadt: [silence, crossed arms]

    Yee: Mr. de Raadt?

    de Raadt: THEO! Tee Aych Eee Ohh! FUCKING THEO! And DO NOT TALK TO ME further until you GET THAT FUCKING MULLET!


    [all in good fun, I'm a rabid OpenBSD user :)]
    • by Slack3r78 ( 596506 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @05:37PM (#8741423) Homepage
      It is official; Netcraft now confirms: GameBoy* is dying One more crippling bombshell hit the already beleaguered GameBoy* community when IDC confirmed that GameBoy* market share has dropped yet again, now down to less than a fraction of 1 percent of all servers. Coming on the heels of a recent Netcraft survey which plainly states that GameBoy* has lost more market share, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. GameBoy* is collapsing in complete disarray, as fittingly exemplified by failing dead last [samag.com] in the recent Sys Admin comprehensive networking test. You don't need to be a Kreskin to predict GameBoy*'s future. The hand writing is on the wall: GameBoy* faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for GameBoy* because GameBoy* is dying. Things are looking very bad for GameBoy*. As many of us are already aware, GameBoy* continues to lose market share. Red ink flows like a river of blood. GameBoy Advanced is the most endangered of them all, having lost 93% of its core developers. The sudden and unpleasant departures of long time GameBoy Advanced developers Jordan Hubbard and Mike Smith only serve to underscore the point more clearly. There can no longer be any doubt: GameBoy Advanced is dying. Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers. GameBoy Color leader Theo states that there are 7000 users of GameBoy Color. How many users of GameBoy Classic are there? Let's see. The number of GameBoy Color versus GameBoy Classic posts on Usenet is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7000/5 = 1400 GameBoy Classic users. VirtualBoy posts on Usenet are about half of the volume of GameBoy Classic posts. Therefore there are about 700 users of VirtualBoy. A recent article put GameBoy Advanced at about 80 percent of the GameBoy* market. Therefore there are (7000+1400+700)*4 = 36400 GameBoy Advanced users. This is consistent with the number of GameBoy Advanced Usenet posts. Due to the troubles of Walnut Creek, abysmal sales and so on, GameBoy Advanced went out of business and was taken over by Sega who sell another troubled OS. Now Sega is also dead, its corpse turned over to yet another charnel house. All major surveys show that GameBoy* has steadily declined in market share. GameBoy* is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If GameBoy* is to survive at all it will be among OS dilettante dabblers. GameBoy* continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, GameBoy* is dead. Fact: GameBoy* is dying
  • SCOboy? (Score:5, Funny)

    by Webmoth ( 75878 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:21PM (#8740537) Homepage
    Oh, great. Now everyone who has a gameboy will have to pay Mr. Darl $699.
    • j00 ph4il 17.. it's OpenBSD, not Linux
    • Now everyone who has a gameboy will have to pay Mr. Darl $699.

      No. Apparently he's forgotten [userfriendly.org] all about it...

    • Re:SCOboy? (Score:3, Funny)

      by websaber ( 578887 )
      I HATE April first, you can never tell what's real, BSD on Game boy? Next youll tell me rush limbuagh is a drug addict and the cubs almost won the pennant
      • Anyone else remember Limbaugh calling Kurt Cobain a "waste of life" because he was a drug addict? Isn't Karma a bitch?

        Jaysyn
      • Re:SCOboy? (Score:3, Funny)

        by endx7 ( 706884 )

        I HATE April first, you can never tell what's real, BSD on Game boy? Next youll tell me rush limbuagh is a drug addict and the cubs almost won the pennant

        They said OpenBSD on a Gameboy, which can't be real. Now, NetBSD on the other hand....

    • Nope.

      This is BSD. BSD is protected under a 1993 settlement between USL and the UC regents.
      • Darl has stated that the *BSDs are his next target...you really think that settlement will stop him? He doesn't listen to reason for anything else...
        • Good. His legal bill will get even bigger. He will get what he deserves in the end. This one is capable of being thrown out of court quickly, as it has already been settled once. What is more, Novell have confirmed that it was settled, and there was no unauthorised Unix code in any of the *BSDs that existed at that time. SCO acquired Unix long after that settlement, and knew all about it. You can't buy something, knowing its (very public) past history, then a few years later, demand redress. What he is doin
  • Ob. Simpsons quote (Score:2, Informative)

    by Lane.exe ( 672783 )
    Best April Fools joke... ever!

  • by Anonymous Coward on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:21PM (#8740543)
    Hey, it may have been six months since the last Slashback, but today as we buckle
    under the strain of another stream of unfunny April Fools "jokes", let's take a
    moment to thank Slashdot's monthly meta publication Trollback [slashdot.org]
    for putting out a fantastic 4/1 issue.

    Way to go, guys.
  • That's cool, but would really have OpenBSD ported to my Casio G-Shock watch.
    Only then will I will secure from malicious crackers, worms and viruses!
  • by Tofino ( 628530 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:22PM (#8740552)
    Wow, typing in those long greps will be a bitch using just that gamepad. Who was saying these jokes aren't imaginative today? :)
  • by Rico_za ( 702279 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:23PM (#8740566)
    oooh, oooh, me first, me first:

    1. Imagine a beowulf cluster of these.
    2. In Soviet Russia, Gameboy ports you
    3. ????
    4. Profit!
  • Bad Joke (Score:5, Informative)

    by Mullen ( 14656 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:23PM (#8740567)
    This is a bad April 1st joke, that should be NetBSD since it runs on everything.
    • ... using NetBSD wouldn't make it a joke, because NetBSD probably DOES run on the GameBoy.

      A check of Google reveals that there has at least been interest/attempts at making NetBSD run on the GameBoy.

      Personally, I think the GameBoy needs OpenBSD, because I'm sick of my GB getting hax0red and 0wned.

    • Re:Bad Joke (Score:2, Funny)

      by bitflip ( 49188 )
      If they'd said NetBSD, I never would've figured out it was a joke.
    • No, it's implausible because BSD is dying.
    • I thought the joke was that anyone was actually working on *BSD. It seemed perfectly logical that if we stipulated *BSD as a rational platform, porting it to a Gameboy would be cake.
    • True, very true. The only thing is, though, that without all the processor-specific security stuff, OpenBSD is basically just as portable as NetBSD. Granted, the codebase has changed since Theo split a while back, but I still see NetBSD code being regularly imported into OpenBSD (for features/bugfixes).

      And as for NetBSD's portability, yeah, it's the most portable, but new platforms (and most especially new archetectures) do still require a ton of work. First, GCC and friends must be ported, stabilized, a
  • Enough! (Score:1, Funny)

    by TheGax ( 572856 )
    Stop now. We get it. It's April Fool's Day.

    Move on, nothing to see here.
  • Oh goody, can't wait to go waste more time running linux on useless hardwdare... Wait, are they going to port Super Mario Brothers to Linux now? OOOOooh Tux Racer on GBA!

    Gotta get coding, if I can port DOS 3.3 to my 8bit NES, I'll be able to play QBasic Snake on my TV. Oh yeah...
    • Uh, I thought DOS ran in 16-bit real mode.
      • MS-DOS is a clone of CP/M, which runs on 8-bit Z80 processors. The Game Boy and GBC processor uses a mostly Z80 compatible instruction set.

        And there are a lot of Snake clones for the GBA already.

    • Gotta get coding, if I can port DOS 3.3 to my 8bit NES

      Should be fairly easy, Apple DOS 3.3 was written for the 6502, same as used in the NES. You'd just have to engineer some custom chips for the cartridge so that you can use Apple floppies, and expand RAM.
  • Do like 4 a day mix em in with real news, but posting one everytime you think of one is not funny. Come up with em before hand cull out the bad and just do a couple. Jeez.
  • Not a joke (Score:2, Informative)

    KDE's Kdevelop [kdevelop.org] can develop game boy advance games!
  • by Mr. Piddle ( 567882 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:25PM (#8740596)

    "Boss, I'm just configuring this firewall, honest!"
  • Figures (Score:5, Interesting)

    by AKAImBatman ( 238306 ) <akaimbatman AT gmail DOT com> on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:26PM (#8740604) Homepage Journal
    They post this and completely ignore Java on Apple ][ [javalobby.org].

    *sigh*

    • lol, apparently no one downloaded the "floppies" before you got your "informative" mod. Even if you guys don't have an Apple IIc, check out the disk images.
      • Oh, but that's just coincedence. I assure you they are still valid Apple II disk images.
        • Reports say that they contain a JPG of a fish. Not very useful, if you ask me. (The creator does claim that it's hidden with steganography in the image, but...)
    • Oh, you laugh... but I've seen a JVM running on an 8051 microprocessor. As far as computational power is concerned... they're probably on the same scale. Regardless, this guy at least had some faked screenshots to back up his ridiculous claims... as opposed to the OpenBSD on GameBoy kids :(

    • Actually, I bet a Java implementation could run on an Apple II, but it would REALLY strain it (well, maybe not a IIGS, but that's cheating, as we now have to compete against this "project"). You might even get it to run on a non-souped-up //e Enhanced or //c, but it would be dog slow, and a Profile would help A LOT. However, if a J2ME implementation that supports the LANceGS is released for any Apple II model, we've got full internet access via ReqWireless WebViewer. We'd almost have to have a ProFile for t
  • OpenBSD? (Score:1, Redundant)

    by faspeed ( 660982 )
    Shouldn't that have been NetBSD?
  • Whatever happened to Linux on the 3COM Audrey [linux-hacker.net]? Now that LinuxBIOS supports the Audrey's GEODE [linuxbios.org], what is holding back that platform?
  • NetBSD I would have believed
  • Technically my gulibility tends to shore up at noon on april fools day....you have to get me with a joke at 6am since i've been reading slashdot for a while now.
  • Geez, this thing could run xpilot, or IF Quake, or... Quit bitching, have fun, it's 4/1!
  • here [charmedlabs.com]

    The above is real. So is ucLinux running on a softcore MicroBlaze processor in a fpga.

  • Imagine a beowulf cluster of these babies!

    *ducks*
  • at least fake screen shots or something ;-)
  • Netbsd, I do belive, runs on it.. At the least it does run on the CPU architecture..

    But i dont even know why i bothered reading /. on April first anyway...
  • no doubt a variety of networking applications will soon follow.

    No doubt this is fake (April Fools!)
  • Number of geeks who clicked that link: 45million and counting

    Number of geeks who didn't click that link since they knew today is the first of April: 0

    Number of geeks who clicked the link and figured out the date: 45million and counting

    Number of geeks (who btw are also 21 years or younger) who sent emails to their fellow geeks about t3h c00l thing of the day: 23million

    Number of geeks who bought a gameboy SP just after reading the headline:542,034 (Nintendo thanks you, /. and CN)

    Number of geeks who are

  • Excellent (Score:5, Funny)

    by Saeed al-Sahaf ( 665390 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @04:45PM (#8740855) Homepage
    I think this will be a boon for smaller webmasters who run their own web sites. Often, the finantial aspect of getting equipment to upgrade your system is problematic. I think the GameBoy is the perfect lower to mid-range web server platform.
  • The links, if you follow them, just all go to generic OpenBSD pages.

    Too bad, since this would be cool and probably isn't even that unrealistic. We've already got Linux for all three of the major tv consoles at the moment plus the Dreamcast...
  • by IWTB ( 157156 )
    Now now... I would like a port of OpenBSD to my old Atari. That would be cool
  • My first 4 or 5 April Fool's days here were pretty funny, but come on fellas. This is really starting to get old.

    Next I'm expecting Taco to post a link about how Enzyte [enzyte.com] really works.

    LK
  • Netcraft confirms, Game Boy Advanced is dead!

  • i would've believed it
  • Nifty (Score:2, Insightful)

    by Mad Ogre ( 564694 )
    You can put BSD on a GBA. Neat. But WHAT THE HELL CAN YOU DO WITH IT?
  • by xot ( 663131 )
    I know this sounds like flamebait but it isnt(hopefully).I have a few questions..

    1. Does anyone use gameboy anymore?
    2.Does anyone use OpenBSD anymore?(FreeBSD's better) :-)
    3. What do i achieve with OpenBSD on my gameboy(if i buy one)?
    4. Why not a Linux based PDA?(with a lot of support available)
    And the FAQ takes you to the OpenBSD website faq.
  • the gameboy has already had HTTP servers and other things writen for it.. i am *not* make this up... im *not* trying to make another april fools reply here... seriously, there was an HTTP server. the GBA has also done things such as run visualizations for winamp... the GBA's serial port can be linked to a PC's serial port for communications. my GBA project [darkain.com]

    and on another note.. i would just like everyone to know that the original GBA and the GBA-SP are the EXACT SAME in terms of hardware... the "SP Plat
  • I might have believed this if it had been done by the NetBSD "I want to run it on my toaster" folks.
  • Old news... (Score:2, Funny)

    by drdreff ( 715277 )
    NetBSD [netbsd.org] was ported to the GB, GBC and GBA as far back as 1992.So it's news when OpenBSD Catches up?

    Happy New Year!

  • I'm using this port as a firewall and spam filter between my GPRS mobile and my headset: last thing I want is spam on my face. When I meet up with friends we use CARP and pfsync to share our rules and state. Who shares vCards anymore ? We share firewall states and rulesets.
  • If it had been NetBSD it would have been believable. The problem with Slashdot's April Fools stories is that most of them are so obivious as to make you not wonder. The real good ones are the ones that are believable enough to make you wonder.
  • On a related note, NetBSD now runs on those Casio watches that were popular in the mid 80's. And on another related note, Theo said he's going to re-join the NetBSD project, because now that OpenBSD is 100% secure, with only one remote hole in the default install in like 70 years, he needs to do the same for NetBSD. Yeah, and did I forget to mention... BSD is dying.

    And all the above BS is coming from a dude who swears by FreeBSD and uses it on 34 computers to do everything from networking servers to desktop

  • It's April 1st, and in other news, Stephen King was found dead in his home at 9:00 this morning. Whether or not you are a fan of his work, he was truely a great American icon.
  • by nmg196 ( 184961 ) on Thursday April 01, 2004 @06:38PM (#8742014)
    That post is dated 8pm. Don't slashdot realise that April Fools day jokes END AT MIDDAY. Why are they still posting these incredibly non funny stories? Last years were way better. They'll never match the 4 dupes of the evil-bit story ever again...

    Probably the main reason that it ends at midday is that everyone's bored of the jokes by then (I certainly am).
  • ...Gamebody Advance SP is reported to be dying.
  • Just another sign that BSD is dead.
  • I hope they created something to deal with power supply issues.
    If
    power()=0{
    then
    keep_going_anyways()}
    BSD is supposed to be stable, but can it get 365 day uptime on a 15 hour battery?
  • Is the author of that page a non-native speaker... or is he implying something?

    "OpenBSD/game boy is the port of OpenBSD for the Japanese game console Nintendo Game Boy.

    Now you can funny with your OpenBSD box everywhere!

    In bus, subway, taxy, school, toilette, restaurant, church, cinema, theatre... "

    I don't want to 'funny' with my openbsd box in the toilet. Or anywhere for that matter. :P
  • So, here comes the time: There IS a GBA webserver out there, and it is functional :D
    Click here for it :D [fivemouse.com]

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