Duke Nukem Forever 'Confirmed' For Late 2008

Duke Nukem Forever 'Confirmed' For Late 2008 344

Posted by Zonk on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:43PM from the funny-weird-not-funny-ha-ha dept.

An anonymous reader writes "A Dallas newspaper is claiming that the long-in-development title Duke Nukem Forever is headed for retail release in late 2008. Unfortunately, game creator 3D Realms says that's not exactly what they meant. 'What the modest Texas newspaper actually seems to suggest is that 3D Realms is "on target" to release the mythical sequel sometime this year, though company president Scott Miller adds, "we may miss the mark by a month or two" (wink, wink). Miller also hinted that "hitting the big three" (in this case, PC, Xbox 360 and PS3) is the obvious development strategy, but he continued to stress that 3D Realms has not "formally announced any platforms for DNF."'"

Duke Nukem Forever 'Confirmed' For Late 2008

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It's not even funny anymore (Score:5, Funny)

by shawn(at)fsu ( 447153 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:45PM (#22323660) Homepage

Now it's just sad.

What a coincidence. (Score:5, Funny)

by jellomizer ( 103300 ) * writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:46PM (#22323686)

That is the time I am expected to finish solving the Towers of Henoi by hand...

Ooh! Can't wait to play it... (Score:5, Funny)

by OglinTatas ( 710589 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:48PM (#22323710)

on my Infinuim Phantom console!

Hahha, GO 3drealms! (Score:5, Funny)

by Eric(b0mb)Dennis ( 629047 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:48PM (#22323712)

This will go down as the greatest joke in gaming history.

I can't wait for the actual game to come out, for an amazingly low price! Gamers pop it into their ready computer, suddenly a huge picture of duke comes up with the oh so famous "I've got balls of steel" soundclip, follow by a picture of those at 3drealms.

After this is done, it will immediately be followed by Rick Astley's newest single.

Forver (Score:4, Funny)

by whtmarker ( 1060730 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:50PM (#22323734) Homepage

Don't hold your breath, you just might be holding it 'Forever'.

Production hit a snag (Score:4, Funny)

by markov_chain ( 202465 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:51PM (#22323746)

The game has gone gold, but they are still waiting for their Moller to fly the master over to the factory.

In related news... (Score:5, Funny)

by djones101 ( 1021277 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:51PM (#22323758)

A press release from the White House recently stated that Hell hath frozen over. Spokesmen close to the President hail this as a significant advance in the war against terror.

Yeah (Score:5, Funny)

by morgan_greywolf ( 835522 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:51PM (#22323760) Homepage Journal

Yeah, I heard it'll be released right alongside Microsoft Flight Simulator: Porcine Edition.

In ralated news... (Score:5, Funny)

by sm62704 ( 957197 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:52PM (#22323778) Journal

My ex-wife, Evil-X, AKA "Satan", moved to Springfield from Chatham last year, effectively making Springfield "Hell, Illinois".

It's snowing as I type this.

Does George read slashdot, I wonder? Does he still post at Planet Crap? Is Planet Crap still online even? DN4ever has taken so long I'm not only not looking 4ward to it anymore, I haven't played anything but "Road Rash" in ages. Oh wait, I played "guitar hero" with my great nephew last Christmas, that game ROCKS!

As to what took it so long, George and Charlie were waiting until their toddlers were old enough to buy it (NC17, right? Or am I thinking of movies? Damn, speaking of DN4ever I'm getting old.

I was playing Duke Nukem since he was a squeaky little side scroller. I wonder if he still has hair and teeth?

-mcgrew

PS- GET OFF MY LAWN!!

Noooooo! (Score:5, Funny)

by Slovenian6474 ( 964968 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:53PM (#22323794) Homepage

Why stop now? I mean, is it Directx 10.1? If not, I'm going to be disappointed. The ONLY solution, rewrite it with the newest tech.

Yeah.... (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:54PM (#22323802)

There's a better chance of the sun turning into a bran muffin than DNF shipping this year.

Re:In ralated news... (Score:5, Funny)

by sam_paris ( 919837 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @02:55PM (#22323814)

Dude, did you just down 10 double espressos or something?

netcraft? (Score:2, Funny)

by FunkyELF ( 609131 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:07PM (#22323992)

Did netcraft confirm it?

2008. Yes, but... (Score:5, Funny)

by Kozar_The_Malignant ( 738483 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:15PM (#22324124)

2008 on which calendar? I'm betting on the Islamic calendar, where the current year is 1429.

SOUND THE GREAT SHOFAR! (Score:2, Funny)

by Eli Gottlieb ( 917758 ) writes: <eligottlieb@gmME ... com minus author> on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:19PM (#22324156) Homepage Journal

The end is nye! Everyone scramble for your bomb shelters and tinfoil hats!

Unless, unless some brave soul can stop the release of this game... all hell will break loose and the world will end.

Won't somebody pick up a big fucking gun and stop the release of Duke Nukem Forever?

Re:12 Years (Score:2, Funny)

by heinousjay ( 683506 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:22PM (#22324190) Journal

What about the 30 year olds who still live in their parent's basement, post anonymously on Slashdot, and rip into other people for the faults they see in themselves?

In Soviet Russia... (Score:5, Funny)

by Orleron ( 835910 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:34PM (#22324340) Homepage

...DNF finishes YOU.

Re:Hahha, GO 3drealms! (Score:2, Funny)

by framauro13 ( 1148721 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:35PM (#22324366)

No Mod points, so you get a +1 Funny reply.

Makes me think of this XKCD comic not too long ago: Trolling [xkcd.com]

In-Game Soundtrack (Score:2, Funny)

by metallic ( 469828 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:49PM (#22324560)

I hear the in-game soundtrack is going to be Guns N' Roses' Chinese Democracy.

Re:What if it comes out? (Score:4, Funny)

by austin987 ( 1233720 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @03:58PM (#22324648)

GNU Hurd

Re:In related news... (Score:5, Funny)

by enderjsv ( 1128541 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:03PM (#22324710)

In other news, an American Airlines commercial airliner crashed just outside of Dallas today after colliding with a flock of flying pigs. Officials are uncertain whether the pigs were members of a terrorist cell organization, or simply the result of Duke Nukem's announced release. We'll keep you posted.

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:4, Funny)

by cytg.net ( 912690 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:05PM (#22324738)

Sad ? Thats just blasphemy, thou shall be modded down till you divide by zero and your account be flushed to /dev/null. Duke Nukem dont get sad, he gets mad!
And dammit i'll play that game .. if i have to code it myself!!!

Re:What if it comes out? (Score:2, Funny)

by TheMadcapZ ( 868196 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:14PM (#22324864)

Oh it is still coming, they set a 2011 release date. The pre-release codename is "REVODNEB" with a production name of:

"Windows: Wishful"

We've still got... (Score:5, Funny)

by mutube ( 981006 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:15PM (#22324878) Homepage

"...this is the year of the Linux Desktop"

/hides

Re:This 'big 3' ? (Score:4, Funny)

by LordLucless ( 582312 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:21PM (#22324942)

Yeah, I bet there are more Wiis in the world than PCs

Re:12 Years (Score:5, Funny)

by halivar ( 535827 ) writes: <bfelger@gmail. c o m> on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:23PM (#22324968)

I'm 28 and still game. Well, I mean, I don't have a family or anything. Or a girlfriend. I mean, I got a cool blood-elf paladin named Crimsonja; does that stand for anything?

But, you know.... if I *did* have a family... uhh... I would... umm...

Oh, jeez. I am so alone^H^H^H^H^Hutterly alone. I'm gonna go sulk with Crimsonja.

Re:Nope, still vaporware (Score:2, Funny)

by TheHorse13 ( 908512 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:25PM (#22324996)

I've said it once and I'll say it again... No Charlie Brown, I won't pull the football away this time...

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:5, Funny)

by abaddononion ( 1004472 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:29PM (#22325058)

Which you will.

Finally! (Score:2, Funny)

by Canosoup ( 1153521 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:47PM (#22325266) Homepage

Geez, I've been waiting outside my local game store for what seems like a decade now.

Re:scott miller and the wii (Score:5, Funny)

by Killjoy_NL ( 719667 ) writes: <<slashdot> <at> <remco.palli.nl>> on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @04:56PM (#22325406)

I see someone didn't get a Wii for christmas from old St. Nick :)

Re:Nope, still vaporware (Score:5, Funny)

by Lord Ender ( 156273 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @05:00PM (#22325460) Homepage

I beat myself in a game of tic tac toe yesterday, so something like this was bound to happen.

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:2, Funny)

by cytg.net ( 912690 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @05:02PM (#22325486)

much like the "whatcouldpossiblegowrong" tag was invented for people like you two ? ;) .. settle the fck down, both of you. Its an order.

It IS doomed! (Score:3, Funny)

by Belial6 ( 794905 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @05:15PM (#22325662)

Well, it is doomed. In the not too distant future, Wii sales are going to plummet. My guess is that it will happen some time after Nintendo releases it's next console. I could be wrong though, it could be after MS or Sony release a new console. This will lead Nintendo to drop production on new units, and all of the existing will eventually fail, wiping the Wii from the face of the earth. Granted, it might take a decade or two for all of this to come to completion, but...

The Wii is DOOMED! DOOMED I tell you!!!

Re:12 Years (Score:5, Funny)

by xtracto ( 837672 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @05:27PM (#22325814) Journal

and now sit alone in a dark house playing videogames, trying to recapture the feeling of their youth, before their spirit was crushed.
Actually, they are playing World of Warcraft

Comment removed (Score:2, Funny)

by account_deleted ( 4530225 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @05:33PM (#22325890)

Comment removed based on user account deletion

About the Wii... (Score:3, Funny)

by Cervantes ( 612861 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @05:56PM (#22326138) Journal

For all those people posting "What about Wii" comments...

Did you ever play Duke Nukem?

Can you imagine some of the gestures they'd include in a Wii version??

Do you really think Nintendo would do anything other than gag and possibly pass out, upon seeing the demo???

Yeah, no way they'd get licensed.

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:5, Funny)

by Doug Neal ( 195160 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @07:46PM (#22327304)

Isn't he all out of gum?
No, in DNF he will be all out of ass. The game will mostly consist of simulated gum-chewing.

I still demand my promised Nintendo 64 version! (Score:3, Funny)

by pecosdave ( 536896 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @07:50PM (#22327348) Homepage Journal

Viva la 64 bit revolution!

Re:12 Years (Score:2, Funny)

by Origian ( 678006 ) writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @09:01PM (#22328118)

Actually, they moderate Slashdot.

Re:Nope, still vaporware (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Wednesday February 06, 2008 @09:16PM (#22328240)

A developer friend of mine at 3D Realms has privately confided to me that Duke Nukem Forever is being coded in Perl 6, so draw your own conclusions...

The original? (Score:2, Funny)

by discHead ( 3226 ) writes: <3zcxrr602@sneakemail.com> on Thursday February 07, 2008 @12:41AM (#22330002) Homepage

http://tinyurl.com/29x2q4 [tinyurl.com]

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:2, Funny)

by nedder ( 690308 ) writes: on Thursday February 07, 2008 @02:04AM (#22330432)

Fool me 630 times......won't get, won't get fooled again.

So... What do you do? (Score:4, Funny)

by PHanT0 ( 148738 ) writes: on Thursday February 07, 2008 @04:44AM (#22331148)

"I work at 3D Realms..."
"Really? What's that like?"
"It's pretty sweet... we sit around a dream up cool stuff based on a 10 year piece of software..."
"A what do you do with these ideas?"
"Press releases, screen mock-ups, teaser trailers... that sort of thing."
"That doesn't sound like a whole lot of work..."
"Nope... we pretty much just like the sound of fake deadlines."
"Fake?"
"Yeah... it's nice to have a boss and investors who don't really care about releasing actual product."
"I wish my boss would take a page out of that book..."
"Who do you work for?"
"Microsoft..."
*snicker*

There may be more comments in this discussion. Without JavaScript enabled, you might want to turn on Classic Discussion System in your preferences instead.

It's not even funny anymore (Score:5, Funny)

What a coincidence. (Score:5, Funny)

Ooh! Can't wait to play it... (Score:5, Funny)

Hahha, GO 3drealms! (Score:5, Funny)

Forver (Score:4, Funny)

Production hit a snag (Score:4, Funny)

In related news... (Score:5, Funny)

Yeah (Score:5, Funny)

In ralated news... (Score:5, Funny)

Noooooo! (Score:5, Funny)

Yeah.... (Score:1, Funny)

Re:In ralated news... (Score:5, Funny)

netcraft? (Score:2, Funny)

2008. Yes, but... (Score:5, Funny)

SOUND THE GREAT SHOFAR! (Score:2, Funny)

Re:12 Years (Score:2, Funny)

In Soviet Russia... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Hahha, GO 3drealms! (Score:2, Funny)

In-Game Soundtrack (Score:2, Funny)

Re:What if it comes out? (Score:4, Funny)

Re:In related news... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:4, Funny)

Re:What if it comes out? (Score:2, Funny)

We've still got... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:This 'big 3' ? (Score:4, Funny)

Re:12 Years (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Nope, still vaporware (Score:2, Funny)

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:5, Funny)

Finally! (Score:2, Funny)

Re:scott miller and the wii (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Nope, still vaporware (Score:5, Funny)

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:2, Funny)

It IS doomed! (Score:3, Funny)

Re:12 Years (Score:5, Funny)

Comment removed (Score:2, Funny)

About the Wii... (Score:3, Funny)

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:5, Funny)

I still demand my promised Nintendo 64 version! (Score:3, Funny)

Re:12 Years (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Nope, still vaporware (Score:1, Funny)

The original? (Score:2, Funny)

Re:It's not even funny anymore (Score:2, Funny)

So... What do you do? (Score:4, Funny)

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