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It's funny. Laugh. GameCube (Games)

Intergalactic Bounty Hunters Wanted 83

Posted by Zonk from the where-do-I-sign-up? dept.
myukew wrote in to let us know about a viral marketing campaign by Nintendo that went awry. A while back Nintendo posted an opening on the jobs board Monster.com for an "Intergalactic Bounty Hunter". The response they received was unnerving. From the article: "Within the first day of posting the job, we had several replies from real applicants who seriously wanted to be an intergalactic bounty hunter for a living. The skills and experience these people listed went beyond surprising into the realm of frightening. We never expected such a wide array of replies from so many people who were actually pursuing interviews for gainful employment as a space warrior."
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Intergalactic Bounty Hunters Wanted More

Intergalactic Bounty Hunters Wanted

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  • Humor (Score:2, Insightful)

    by MyLongNickName ( 822545 )
    Methinks they don't understand that some folks might also have a sense of humor and reply accordingly. I doubt that anyone with an IQ low enough to think this is real would know how to turn on their PC.

    • Re:Humor (Score:5, Insightful)

      by mrseigen ( 518390 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:37PM (#11541918) Homepage Journal
      Honestly, nothing humanity does on the Internet surprises me.

      • Re:Humor (Score:2, Flamebait)

        by NanoGator ( 522640 )
        "Honestly, nothing humanity does on the Internet surprises me."

        Gee, a cynical view of humanity posted on the internet. Surprising.

    • Re:Humor (Score:3, Insightful)

      by Anonymous Coward
      On the other hand, I've met plenty of otherwise intelligent people with a few oddball beliefs (UFOs, some-weird-never-released-cold-war-technology, religion, &c.). [Of course, I've met a lot of morons with oddball beliefs too; however, those beliefs often follow the trend of popular cinema and can be traced back to a simple source like "The Crow".]

      Thus, it's not unbelievable to me that 80-or-so high functioning people would believe this. "A Beautiful Mind" aside, you don't have to be a mathematician to

    • Re:Humor (Score:4, Funny)

      by Rufus88 ( 748752 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:39PM (#11541946)
      I doubt that anyone with an IQ low enough to think this is real would know how to turn on their PC.

      You'd be surprised how easy it is, apparently, to turn on a PC.
    • nah.. they understand it.

      they're just MILKING THE FREE PR FOR ALL IT'S WORTH.

      gotta use less caps, stupid that.
    • If you have listened to late night radio, you would have to wonder...

  • Weak (Score:5, Insightful)

    by b00m3rang ( 682108 ) * on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:22PM (#11541737)
    They talk about all the oh-so-frightening skills that people presented, but they don't list one. Are they blind to the fact that at least some of these "real applicants" were probably just playing pranks of their own?

    • Re:Weak (Score:5, Interesting)

      by curtisk ( 191737 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:33PM (#11541872) Homepage Journal
      Are they blind to the fact that at least some of these "real applicants" were probably just playing pranks of their own?

      yeah I'm sure they were aware of it, this story/situation is just the "wrap-up" piece to this marketing gimmick, just the last drop squeezed out of this campaign.

  • I know that they are surprised... (Score:3, Insightful)

    by Slime-dogg ( 120473 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:29PM (#11541829) Journal

    But I really want to know what these scary skills were. I want to hear the stories of various dark-alley applicants who use a garrote like I use a pencil.

    • Re: Secrets Revealed (Score:3, Insightful)

      by vettemph ( 540399 )
      It's as though Nintendo has revealed the fact that they uncovered huge secrets but they can't tell us what they are. This has to be the most fustrating story I've seen in years. They need to show us ALL of the responses or just stfu.
      • This has to be the most frustrating story I've seen in years. They need to show us ALL of the responses or just stfu.

        You sound as gullible as their purported applicants.
      • In other words, there are known knowns, that is, we know that people applied, and there are known unknowns, that is we know they made scary remarks, but we don't know what they were, and then there are unknown unknowns that we don't know about at all.

  • I wonder... (Score:3, Interesting)

    by EhobaX ( 593420 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:33PM (#11541867)
    how many people had the same resume as the Comic Book guy in the Simpsons.
  • I had an RPG pencil and paper I wrote called Intergalactic Bounty Hunter, spent 4000 hours trying to make it the first MMORPG, but college got in the way. Some other company made an Intergalactic Bounty Hunter video game last year but had a nasty letter from Lucas Arts.

    • Re:My RPG! (Score:3, Interesting)

      by hunterx11 ( 778171 )
      I had a pencil and paper RTS unimaginatively called "Space Wars." It involved taping six sheets of paper together, and using a fixed number of "points" each turn to build/equip/repair/transport ships. After a while it got a bit crowded though, with all the crossed-out ships that were destroyed or had moved. I had a folder detailing the different classes of ships (each player only had certain ships available to them) and the points to build/equip, etc. I have no fucking idea why I just wrote this, but I real
    • Yeah and it had a guy who carried two swords, and the swords had ROCKETS IN THE HANDLES! OH MY GOD I'M EXPLODING WITH AWESOME!

  • This is not funny ! (Score:5, Funny)

    by DangerSteel ( 749051 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:40PM (#11541961)
    I was always busy, plenty of beings to hunt. Had great benefits, see the universe, meet new peoples, traveled a lot too as an intergalactic bounty hunter.

    But then outsourcing reared its ugly head and Lur, the leader of Persius omicron V started having his people do it for half the cost...

    • Re:This is not funny ! (Score:2, Insightful)

      by Anonymous Coward
      Lur, the leader of Persius omicron V

      Do you mean Lrr, the ruler of Omicron Persei 8?

    • Re:This is not funny ! (Score:4, Funny)

      by Jerf ( 17166 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @04:13PM (#11543767) Journal
      Have you considered moving into the so-called "human-horn" trade?

      There is rumor that there is a second, more potent "horn" available near where the legs meet the torso, though you need to remove the "clothing". Best of luck with that, though; I've tried it but I only find one about half the time. Still, it keeps the belligerent and numerous children fed with something other than "me".
    • Not to mention affirmative action compounding the problem. Nowadays you have to be a crippled female minority to even be considered for intergalactic bounty hunter. Just hope your wheelchair isn't one of the pieces of equipment you lose at the start of your next mission.

  • Military Tech (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Ironsides ( 739422 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:44PM (#11542014) Homepage Journal
    "Many of the serious applications we received came from users who reply to job postings without carefully reading the job description. Most of these applicants are ex-military, and they jumped at the chance of working in an exciting and high-risk field. As for the alien technology and other out-of-this-world references in our job posting, perhaps these ex-military personnel know something about government weapons research that we don't?" Nintendo's Senior Director of Public Relations Beth Llewelyn told GameDAILY BIZ.

    Seeing as how my parents (both retired Mil) keep saying that they were using stuff, that just came out for us consumers, 20 years ago, I would say "yes, they do know something we don't". I have heard Military Tech described as this "Take what you see, evolve it 3 or 4 generations, that is what they (DoD) have". To be declasified in 20 or 30 years.

    • Re:Military Tech (Score:3, Interesting)

      by I_Love_Pocky! ( 751171 )
      "Take what you see, evolve it 3 or 4 generations, that is what they (DoD) have"

      Sure, and we can't even provide armor for our troops. Keep dreaming.

      • Re:Military Tech (Score:1, Funny)

        by Anonymous Coward
        Look, we don't need all that so-called "protection" for our armies in Iraq. What we need is democracy, and what we gave them is more powerful than any rocket propelled grenade or rail gun.

        Besides, we're saving our best shit for North Korea. Those sumbitches are crazy.
      • Actually, they just need to harvest more Vespene gas before they can upgrade the armor. And you KNOW how hard it is to get up the tech tree when the fsckers keep trying to rush you. Everyone wants to be a Marine or a Goliath pilot, nobody wants to drive an SCV.
      • Some day, you'll grow up enough to comprehend the difference between R&D and logistics.

    • Re:Military Tech (Score:5, Informative)

      by MerlynEmrys67 ( 583469 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @02:14PM (#11542404)
      3 or 4 generations ahead ??? I don't think so. Was in the army late 80's - Did communications, what did I do - basically a digital mobile phone network.

      What was the computer that drove this in 1989? Well to start with it had 64K of Iron Core memory and a 8 MB tape drive. My 486 of the day kicked its ass for processing power, memory (20 MB), and had a 120 MB hard drive.

      What were the links ?
      Basically wireless T-1 links, quite a bit behind the T-3 lines that were common at the time.

      Would I call this generations ahead ?
      I don't think so - Cell networks weren't mobile - but mounting all the equipment on the back of a Humvee isn't all that radical
      Cell networks weren't digital at the time either - but it wasn't long until they were
      And frankly the phones were huge compared to the brick phones you could buy in Radio Shack at the time.

      Advanced - sure, cutting edge - I'll buy, 3 generations ahead - not a chance in hell

    • Or more likely a few generations ahead simply because it's not financially feasible for companies to try to sell the products. Who else but the US DoD could afford cutting edge tech? Think about it, what do you think engineers could build if they had a near unlimited budget?

    • Re:Military Tech (Score:3, Informative)

      by Anonymous Coward
      I had a professor in college who was retired NSA. She had said that the military wasn't all that advanced, except in hardening the technology used against various environmental effects. The NSA, on the other hand, had stuff that, as she put it, "take the satellites and technology you see spies use in the movies, and advance it five years. Thats the NSA." I guess it depends on how you define a "generation."

    • So have your parents come clean about the easter bunny and santa claus yet?

      Aww sorry, didn't mean to spoil it for you....
  • Oh come on Nintendo. You tell us you got real apps...show em! Blur out the personally identifying info and give us the good stuff. ;)

  • Job Interview (Score:5, Funny)

    by tiktok ( 147569 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:57PM (#11542183) Homepage
    Ahh yes, Mr. Fett, your resume is quite impressive. However, I did notice a slight gap in your work history. Oh, you say you've been in a Sarlac pit being slowly digested for the past 75 years? That's reasonable I suppose. But I also tried contacting your last employer, a Mr. Hutt, and he appears to be dead. You might want to update your references. Well, thanks for stopping by Mr. Fett, we'll call you. And please don't kill anyone on your way out.

  • Any response from the time traveller? (Score:3, Funny)

    by MarkGriz ( 520778 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @01:58PM (#11542189)
    Any response from the time traveller? [inertramblings.com]. Seems this job would be right up his alley.

  • Surprised? (Score:2, Insightful)

    by deemaunik ( 699970 )
    Who was surprised? We have a culture that's bred a half dozen Star Wars movies, hundreds of spinoffs, billions of dollars of revenue, spanning multiple decades and generations... and people are surprised some individuals take it a little seriously? Come on, be realistic. *Hides his fanboy collections*
  • Seems like you'd be violating some kind of monster.com EULA by posting a fake job as a cheap advertisement ruse. I'd go and check it out myself, but if I log into that site I will undoubtedly find a number of jobs paying better than this one and end up leaving work early...

    Now that I think about this tho - maybe Metroid is really just a testing machine, and they really are looking for Intergalactic Bounty Hunters...anyone remember The Last Starfighter [imdb.com]?

    • Re:monster.com doesn't care? (Score:1, Insightful)

      by Anonymous Coward
      Seems like you'd be violating some kind of monster.com EULA by posting a fake job as a cheap advertisement ruse. I'd go and check it out myself, but if I log into that site I will undoubtedly find a number of jobs paying better than this one and end up leaving work early...

      I doubt that Monster cares as long as they get paid. Of the jobs I've applied for, none were actually hiring at the time, and/or were headhunters looking for names to add to their list. Out of all the emails from potential "employers"
    • anyone remember The Last Starfighter?

      Unfortunately, yes.

  • Well, it worked. (Score:5, Insightful)

    by superultra ( 670002 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @02:26PM (#11542529) Homepage
    myukew wrote in to let us know about a viral marketing campaign by Nintendo that went awry.

    So, I wonder what was actually the viral marketing campaign: posting a job on Monster.com where 90 people read it and then replied, or a bunch of games news sites like games.slashdot and gamesdaily rehashing a statement by a PR read by hundreds of gamers if not thousands?

    Or, more eloquently: "Who's the more foolish...the fool or the fool who follows him?"
  • The article is nothing but PR fluff. From the article: (emphasis mine)

    Although Nintendo obviously would not be willing to divulge what its viral plans are for other upcoming titles, with the company's long history of shaking things up through the Internet medium, you can be sure they'll be at it again when the right game comes along.

    I mean, come on? Nintendo is *not* the kind of company that "shakes things up." They stick with tried-and-true franchises, or rebrand ideas into those same franchises,


  • * Planetary Sector Bovin Meat Cooking Specialist
    (Burger Flipper)

    * District Radio Interplanetary Communication officer
    (Telemarketer)

    * World Wide Web Developer
    (some guy who works on a website for his mom and his local D&D club)

    * Halfing Extermination Specialist
    (some guy who roleplays with the Web developer)

  • Contracting Insanity (Score:5, Interesting)

    by Anonymous Coward on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @02:56PM (#11542897)
    Posted anonymously, because I don't want to be linked with these people. In the interests of their privacy, some details have been changed.

    I'm an information-security consultant. During the big tech downturn a few years ago, a group in Chicago asked about my services. They didn't trust email or phones, though, so I had to make the trip into Chicago to meet them directly. I told them that it would cost them money to have me head out to Chicago, but they assured me there wouldn't be a problem there.

    In the meeting, they presented me with a cashier's check to cover my initial consultation fee and traveling expenses. Given it was the tech downturn, my initial fee wasn't huge, but between it and travel expenses the check was a nontrivial amount of money. A few hours went by as I did a quick evaluation of their systems. Finally, the preliminary assessment complete, I presented possibilities to my employers.

    They thanked me, but warned: "The people we're concerned about are ... very, very subtle. They're also very underhanded and not bound by law." I asked if we were talking organized crime, and my employers demurred. After about another fifteen minutes of careful "I can't effectively help you if I don't know who you're up against", they confided in me their group's purpose.

    They were a support group for people on the run from the Illuminati.

    ("The Bavarian Illuminati?" I asked, wondering if I'd heard it right. I got a fifteen-minute spiel about how the Illuminati isn't Bavarian, and how the Bavarian Illuminati was a disinformation campaign from the real Illuminati, which wasn't even really called the Illuminati but this group hadn't been able to find its real name yet.)

    After fifteen minutes of listening to these people tell me, quite calmly and quite lucidly, the most wacko paranoiac conspiracy theories I've ever heard, I realized I had to get out of there in a big-ass hurry. So I politely told them "I'm sorry, but I'm not comfortable going up against the Bavar... err, the Illuminati. I think you need someone else."

    They said they understood completely. I left the cashier's check on the table, explaining to them that I didn't feel comfortable taking their money if I wasn't willing to help them in their struggle against the, err, Illuminati. I got out of there and headed back home.

    The real reason I didn't take their money was I was afraid word would get out in the information-security community of just who I'd worked for. I wanted to be able to outright deny ever knowing these people, ever meeting these people, ever being party to their insanity.

    There is no Illuminati. There are no runners from the Illuminati. I was never approached by people who wanted to create a secure network for people who were on the run from the Illuminati to communicate with each other over.

    No, I was approached by a bunch of dangerously delusional people.

    But whenever information-security geeks get together and share stories about the weirdest clients we've ever had--at least, the clients we can talk about--well. I've had fellow geeks buying me beers for the last couple of years just on the strength of these wackos. :)

    • Re:Contracting Insanity (Score:1, Funny)

      by Anonymous Coward
      I know who you are talking about. They are not whackjobs.
      • I see. A well-formed and informative response to the grandparent post. Let's hear something a bit more persuasive, maybe?
      • I'm for hire, I don't care if they are whackjobs. Money is money. Check out my journal. Contact me through a secure channel.
        P.S. If my journal looks blank you are not using the secure browser.
        BTW. I will take contract work, I do not join any cause or pledge loyalty.
        Cheers,
    • Oh, great. Just great. My sister was the one on the run, you insensitive clod, and now she's disappeared. And all because you wouldn't help set up the safe house for her.
  • From TFA:

    Although Nintendo obviously would not be willing to divulge what its viral plans are for other upcoming titles, with the company's long history of shaking things up through the Internet medium, you can be sure they'll be at it again when the right game comes along.

    Nintendo had best be careful for which games they advertise like this in the future. Sometimes the wackos may even be qualified. I mean, I'm sure we can all imagine the "typical fantasy geek" attempting to learn a few new skills t

  • A favorite Ad Slogan (Score:3, Funny)

    by kid_wonder ( 21480 ) <public@kscottkle i n . c om> on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @03:34PM (#11543320) Homepage
    Join the Army.
    Travel to Distant Lands.
    Meet Interesting People.
    Kill Them.

  • Viral marketting success? (Score:5, Interesting)

    by AzraelKans ( 697974 ) on Tuesday February 01, 2005 @06:17PM (#11545360) Homepage
    It would be interesting to know how many people actually bought Halo 2 due to the first interesting then just annoying "ilovebees" webpage.

    There are 2 details bugging me, those who even noticed these sort of campaigns are already fans, those who follow it to the very end also (not only have not much of a life) are definetily geeks and tech, sci-fi enthusiasts. Was there any chance they wouldnt have bought the game anyway? (Now that was a great way to expend 1 million bucks!)

    About Metroid , mod as you will, but I think if they had implemented a decent online mode (instead of the golden eyetastic 4 player deathmatch) the sales were had been a lot more impressive. Xbox: halo 2, ps2: socom, cube: metroid online!
    The 1 player mode is great but the deathmatch is a complete joke. (heres hoping for the DS version)

    p.s. How many people even noticed, this viral campaign? anyway, its news to me.

    Go ahead MOD my day
  • This explains why I didn't get hired...

    I just figured I wasn't qualified fully.

  • I applied for such a job once (Score:3, Funny)

    by Flyboy Connor ( 741764 ) on Wednesday February 02, 2005 @09:46AM (#11549835)
    I responded to a job offer for a bounty hunter, and got hired, but I soon found out that I mostly got to do FedEx quests. And the XP I received was dismal. So I quit. I am now looking for something in the line of being a spy or vampire. Slim pickin's, though.

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